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Identity LGBT+

6 Tips for Coming out as Non-Binary

Coming out as non-binary to the people in your life can be difficult, mostly because you might find that a lot of them don’t understand what it means, and you might find yourself on the receiving end of a lot of questions. We want to make sure you have an easy a time as possible when you are talking about this, so we’ve got a few tips for how you can come out as non-binary. 

Come out to yourself first and foremost

Before you come out to anyone else, you need to make sure you are comfortable with who you are for you. Come out to yourself, do some research, find some people or a community that can help you with the process. Feeling supported and prepared will help you come out to others in your life. 

Have some resources ready to help

If you feel like you are coming out to someone who is not likely to understand, or they are going to ask you a lot of difficult questions, have a few resources or links ready to show them. This article details the key parts of what is means to be non-binary, and this one has some tips on how someone can you support you through this journey. 

Choose a place you feel comfortable

Remember that you are the centre of this conversation and what is most important is that you feel confident and comfortable going into it. Pick a space that feels familiar to you, or where you feel your most calm. Have a place to go for when the conversation comes to an end so you can each take a break, digest what has been said and calm any emotions that might have flared.

Consider who you are coming out to 

Have a think about who you are choosing to come out to. What will they respond to the best? Will they be understanding and kind to you? How are they likely to react? Although this is not about them, it’s important that you feel comfortable before going in to this conversation. If they respond well to having a plan, then have some resources they can look over. If they are generally quite empathetic, then talk about it in sentences that begin with “i feel or I have felt”. 

Remember you don’t have to come out to everyone all at once

This is your coming out journey and you can do it at your own pace. You don’t have to tell everyone in your life at the same time. You can choose who you tell and when and you shouldn’t feel any guilt about not telling some people that you are close with straight away.

And that they may not understand at first, and that’s OK

Feeling like you should be instantly accepted by them is only natural. But it’s OK to give people a little bit of time to think about it and come around. You have just told them something huge about the way you are and how you want to live your truth going forward, and some people, especially parents or close family members, might need a little time to reconcile who you are with what they always wanted for you.

This is OK, and you should try to manage your emotions after the conversation. Just because they need a moment does not mean they will not accept you in the future.

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